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Miniblog #26: Recalibrating My Life

by Carson T. Clark on October 6, 2010

This might sound too mechanical, but I need to recalibrate my life. For 18 months I’ve been battling the onset of depression. I’ve been “winning” in that I’ve not succumb to full-blown melancholy, but the numb exhaustion I now feel is almost worse. After recovering from a crippling migraine this afternoon I’ve spent the past couple hours in serious thought and prayer. What I’ve realized is that I’ve been surviving rather than thriving because I’ve failed to live proportionally to my values. Some things have grown to occupy too much space while others have shrunk so as not to occupy enough. Specifically, I’ve spent too much time following politics and sports, writing blogs, and interacting on facebook and too little time playing basketball, listening to music, investing in friendships, reading books, drawing, and praying. Life experience has taught me that I’m not able to take small corrective measures, though. I have to go cold turkey on the bloated values and then slowly, carefully reintroduce them while strongly emphasizing the neglected values and then slowly, carefully cutting back. So that’s what I’m going to do. Among other things, over the next two weeks I’m not going to check my facebook or write any blog posts followed by two weeks in which I write posts but don’t interact with any of the comments. If anyone needs to get a hold of me, I’ll still be checking my email and phone. Your prayers would be most appreciated.

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